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you never forget these formulative years- Mrs. Dizon
no 3
Wow what a break,
What can I say?
So many things have happenned
from then till today.
In two short weeks
it seemed long sometimes
Where can I start?
I need some rhymes.
Cool, Friends, JA, family.
A car, washing dishes, and presents
How could I forget about gifts?
Those are cool.
A crash course in Life I've recieved
Where not everyone is a pal
and looks can decieve.
Doesn't it feel like that song?
Walking contradiction by Greenday?
Where everything has gone wrong?
Funny how I'm dealt a weird hand.
I have a ten.
Ten problems, friends, family
a symbol of companionship
or misery.
Next a Jack of clubs
that shows nothing much
What is in a Jack anyway?
It isn't worth anything such.
A queen I have
I just don't appreciate
I don't give a hoot
She's fussy anyway.
Now I'm the king in a toppled kingdom
I've lost my rule
Where did my authority go?
reduced to a fool?
Last but not least is the Ace
The beginning, sometimes the end
How I got into this mess in the first place.
A fickle friend.
A stupid hand is what I got
Nothing useful
A winner not,
No wait, It's a Royal Flush.
I won in a way?
I guess its just the way one should look at things.
A bed of roses could be thorns and rashes.
and Garbage might be the next best win.
It's all a matter of perspective.
These last two weeks could be a blessing in disguise..
Only time will tell.
[psycho infatuation]
Its all a crazy thing
What I' m feeling now
Some real stupid sting
is piercing my brow
No make that my head
I feel so dumbfounded
like Im dead
You're all I think about
Am I trapped?
No one hears my shouts
Do I love you?
Should I stay?
Live a lie?
or go away?
I hate questions.
No I loathe this feeling.
Its like what all those
love songs, composed,
say.
To love is the greatest thing,
and to hate is to go away.
Oh well,
Im in hell.
But sometimes it feels like heaven.
Sometimes it's worthwhile
Its like Im in 7-11
or a toy with a little child.
I'm happy
I'm sad
I'm sappy.
I'm mad.
I'm cruel.
I'm a fool.
Am I in love?
nah, its those damn hormones speaking.
Funny Theres a pain I just cant seem to identify I have no clue where it could be I feel it near my eyes It shakes me at the knee. My teeth just chatter and grind My voice just goes up and down My stuff I can't seem to find I must look like a clown I sweat like a strong rain It pours like drool Damn where is this pain that makes me act like a fool I'm late for class I'm late for dinner My parents ask, You look thinner? All I do is just day dream I'm getting happy, you can tell That how it seems from the look of my swell Im more clumsy I can't help it I bump into trees and step on dog sh#t I can't think straight No I can but it means something else What is this fate? What more should it tell? When I close my eyes I see you, and only you In whhatever i try You're all I wanna do That sounds wierd, I know But in my heart, I know I'm psycho, thats where you are. What have you done to me I'm like a kid No worse a baby or a fly in a lid Im trapped I shouldn't be as vulnerable I feel like crap. I'm in love Did I just say love? Some wierd woman thing? I think Iwas shoved, Pushed into a fling.. Well one thing lead to another We talked we laughed It seemed like forever. Then out of the blue it ended and now i'm alone doing nothing much but writing this poem no phone, or such It hurts. You ask-why? Theres nothing much worse than it coming from me, a guy. I'm supposed to be happy Not care at all I should be out to be free Or playing basketball But no Im here a loner Cant do anything fine Not even raise a boner Ok that was out of line.. Well I hope you're all great Now don't be lazy go to parties, movies, and dates You've made me crazy You were all the good I ever knew You were the sunshine after the rain Oh no... What could I do I'm in so much pain.. So here I am outside awake from a slumber Wow, who was that girl? I gotta have her number...
“Can we really say what we want to f*#^ing say?” Or Censorship in our world
Communication has always been a vital part of our world. It has power over the advancement of government, technology, ideas, and people. We live in a society that demands interaction, good or bad- it is a necessity. However, in modern times the conveying of our ideas or communication has been a target of censorship. The Internet, which is a wonderful tool in our time, is probably the number one object of many censors. This has a both pros and cons. For instance while the web is diverse in both topics and subjects, there are also those sites, which invoke violence, sex, and immoral values. Recently there has been a blue ribbon campaign going around the net that is against censorship. This has been a very controversial thing, and will probably be argued for a long time. Another “victim” of censorship is the media. The media, which isn’t only television, and radio, but the whole entertainment assemblage, is constantly being blamed for the violence in our adolescent population. While some of this is true, we cannot put the reproach on the media alone. We must examine other factors that shape a person’s background, like culture, family, and environment. As a teenager myself, I can say that, the media is an influence on me, but only to a certain extent. I won’t be motivated to murder a person, after watching Scream, but remember that not everyone is like me. Everywhere in our world, censorship takes its toll. Even on our little, secluded island, it is present. In our newspaper, the PDN, for example they censor any language they find inappropriate. In Father Duenas High, there is censorship. We can’t express ourselves artistically through our bookcovers anymore because the administration accepts only plain covers. We are restricted in our dress code during the buy- a- changes to not wear any obscene, political, or offensive printed clothing. Our lives here at Duenas are just a metaphor of how our world works. About 200 years ago, our ancestors came to the United States to escape oppression from England. Now centuries later, our government through the implementation of the censors is still controlling us. Censorship may prevent the corruption of our youth but at what cost to our society? It may be our individuality and diversity or some other abstract idea that contribute to the wonders of our country. As long as we are a democratic people, the controversy of free speech and censorship will always be an issue.
Something has gone wrong
I think some component in our society, has gone wrong. Our generation has evolved into a group of individuals that are unfeeling and only seek one thing, self-gratification. Right now, China has floods, the yen continues to drop, and World War 3 tension is stirring. But who actually gives a crap? The Clinton Scandal is much more fascinating. The media has distorted the American people’s priorities. The bombings in Kenya, Sudan, Afghanistan, and Tanzania, should have been a wake-up call to the world. But, these travesties were not regarded as highly as that of the President’s promiscuous affairs. During the bombings lives were lost and property was damaged, but people focused on a presidential affaire d'amour instead. We think of the President as a superhero or god in some eyes, but we must remember that he is human too. Anytime one turns on the radio, cracks open a newspaper, or even clicks the power button on the remote, Clinton and his personal scandal are evident. He has a family, a personal life, and dignity--- these things shouldn’t be tampered by the public. It really isn’t our fault that we are exposed to this Clinton- Lewinskey thing all the time. The blame should be put on the media. One night I was watching Saturday Night Live. They had a sketch wherein President Clinton, Saddaam Hussein, and Monica Lewinskey were having a 3- way conference call. The public was too focused on the scandal, so Clinton asked Sadaam to create a diversion (an example of life imitating art as seen through the movie Wag the Dog.), so that the eyes of the country could concentrate on something else. After watching this and finding humor in the farce, I pondered to myself. I thought of who the “real” victim was. We live in a time where self-gratification is the main thing in peoples lives, and we don’t care who we trample on to experience some of that good stuff. There was once a time when our culture cared about the events in our world and found repugnance in sex, drugs, and what have you. This was the “good old days.” Like I said, everyday people die, the poor get exploited, and another child goes hungry, but in this time of ours, who cares? Wouldn’t you rather watch a sex scandal? The media has succeeded in twisting our views on life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Something much more than an A
When I was about five or six years old, I had my first haircut (the one I remember). I was short back then, about 3 or 4 feet, so I had a booster seat. Sitting on top of the chair with my special boost, I would stare at my reflection in the mirror. Snip, snip, snip went the barber’s scissors, and my hair would fall, fall, fall. I didn’t have a problem with the scissors part; it was the razor I loathed. But I had no choice. The razor scraped at the side of my head and made the fine cuts that gave the taper its name. After that I had the shaving cologne applied. Whew, It was finally over… for now. My parents would say things like, “Wow, that looks clean and neat,” or, “You look so handsome!” Sure, that’s how I looked outside, inside however I was in pain. I dreaded going back. My parents on the other hand, would say, “Boys are supposed to have short haircuts.” Believe it or not, my story does have a point: Just like myself, Hester had to conform to society’s standards. She is not only a character in an old book, but a symbol of the oppressed and exploited in our society. Probably the most evident metaphor Hester represents are women in general. In most societies women were inferior to men. Hawthorne broke the mold by creating Hester Prynne as something different. We can see that she stands out from other women from the following quote: The young woman was tall, with a figure of perfect elegance on a large scale. She had dark and abundant hair, so glossy that it threw off the sunshine with a gleam; and a face which, besides being beautiful from regularity of feature and richness of complexion, had the impressiveness belonging to a marked brow and deep black eyes. She was ladylike, too, after the manner of the feminine gentility of those days; characterized by a certain state and dignity, rather than by the delicate, evanescent, and indescribable grace which is now recognized as its indication. (Chapter 2 Hawthorne compares her to the “Broad shoulders and well-developed busts, and on round and ruddy cheeks – chapter 2” of the women of the town. From the beginning she is marked as different. It shows her being progressive and liberal. Hester is a symbol of today’s modern woman. A fatherless child, working single mothers, does that ring a bell? Today like in the past, it has always been the mother who takes care of the children. Statistics show that child custody is greatly granted toward the mother instead of the father. Hester was in our terms, “a working single mom.” She was the seamstress of the town, and supported Pearl with the money she earned, her father didn’t. She worked so hard that the scarlet letter came to mean “able.” Women go through more emotional pain than men do, most of the time (look at all the magazines and self-help books devoted to them). As seen in the book and depicted in the movie by Demi Moore, it is apparent that Hester went through a lot of pain. She showed how her threshold of pain survives even in unpredictable times in the following quote: But now, with this unattended walk from her prison door, began the daily custom; and she must either sustain and carry it forward by the ordinary resources of her nature, or sink beneath it. She could no longer borrow from the future to help her through the present grief. Tomorrow would bring its own trial with it; so would the next day, and so would the next: each its own trial, and yet the very same that was now so unutterably grievous to be borne. The days of the far-off future would toil onward, still with the same burden for her to take up, and bear along with her, but never to fling down; for the accumulating days and added years would pileup their misery upon the heap of shame. (Chapter 5 The word “burden” is stressed. She didn’t know how long she would be carrying her sin. Lastly, Hester showed women’s loyalty or lack of it. She kept her loyalty to Dimmesdale, even at the cost of her public life. She sacrificed her reputation for the man she thought she was “destined” for. Like modern women today, who stay with the very men who abuse them and bring them down, Hester chose to stay. She chose, she wasn’t forced to do so. Another attribute Hester represents are those who want to make a difference. In strict Puritan society, change was regarded as evil. It had a set of many rules, and standards that were supposed to govern life. Utopia or a perfect world was their goal. In the book Puritanism was so commanding that it was called, “an iron framework.” In our world we are sometimes like the Puritans of the past. We govern ourselves by countless laws, we sometimes get too caught up in our world, and we shun those who don’t follow. In our system of government there are a great many number of laws. These govern mostly every aspect of our lives. There are a system of taxes, a system of rules, laws that prohibit us from doing this or that, and a hierarchy of Public officials. Our world has gotten too complicated. Doesn’t that feel like an, “iron framework?” Hawthorne predicted that when he said that government officials are “useless.” Sometimes our lives move by so fast, we feel small and powerless. We miss the most important things in our lives like family, friendship, and of course love. Hester didn’t and she acted on it. She shows us that in our world there will always be time for our family, our significant, and ourselves others. When someone falls out of our intricate system of life, most of us will look down on him or her. Look at the man near the ITC building. Waif, homeless, jobless, poor, are the words to describe him. We all say we want to help, but what do we do? Nothing. Of course we don’t say it out loud. Hester was just like him. Hester was one of the Puritan’s castaways from their society. She was different, she dared to be. She chose her path it wasn’t chosen for her. She broke out of the master mold and mainstream opinion to experience something greater—love. Today on Farrenholt Ave, on the way to church, I saw a little kitten get hit by a car. It was still moving in pain, and no one did anything. It was heartbreaking. I wanted to help but what could I do?? I felt just like Dimmesdale. I could have done something to ease the pain of someone else. But I didn’t. The scarlet letter story isn’t merely fiction, it’s an explanation of society. Society can be cruel, harsh, and uncaring at times. We sometimes feel like we’re outside looking in. Being accepted has come to mean more than it ever has. Society’s standards are the backbone of our way of life. Were either in or out. But just like the wild rose book near the prison door, there are those who follow Hester’s path and dare to speak out and be different.This section updated regularly